I haven’t had a great deal of hours this week, but I’m still pretty exhausted. I think what’s making me particularly tired tonight is anticipation of my opening shift tomorrow. I have to be up at 6:30 am to get ready and leave at 7 and I can already feel the anger brewing that I’ll be directing towards my alarm clock. The benefit of an early shift is that I’ll also get done early, and after that I have two days off! In a row! Who knew!? What makes these two days particularly wonderful is that one of them is payday so I’ll be able to set aside my money for bills and then get a friend’s birthday present and possibly replace my quickly dying phone. It’s the little things in life that keep you going.
I have a headache so this won’t be a very long post but I’m just checking in to say I’m still here and work is still the main thing in my life. I’ve been trying to refocus towards the positive lately and repeating certain things. I’m grateful I have a job, that I can cover my bills, and that I’m still working towards a better future for myself and my family. I’m glad that I have a way to get to work and that I’m competent at my job. I’m glad I have a place to come back to when it’s done. I know that tomorrow the promise of two days off in a row will keep me going, and I hope you all have something to get you through the rest of your work week as well.
Tonight’s dinner was thrown together on a whim. I love pulled pork to death, but pork is more expensive than chicken so I decided to go that route. I put the chicken, some onion and bbq sauce in the crock pot and enjoyed my day off. After it was cooked through, I make some Parmesan mashed potatoes and sauteed some garlic green beans. The family approves wholeheartedly, and I don’t mean to toot my own horn, but I did damn good.
Hey there Yogis,
So as you may have noticed, there’s been a distinct lack of action on this blog. I’ve gotten caught up in work and my personal life and I haven’t really dedicated my time to a set yoga routine. That being said, I know that I’ve been doing it. I find myself naturally going through some basic poses on a regular basis, but I wasn’t sure how to explain that to my blog. It’s easier to just post a link to a video and say “hey this is what I did” but I feel like it might be cheating to go “I did some yoga stretches today – go me!”
An unexpected (but totally foreseeable) issue with committing myself to a blog like this is that I’m finding myself more worried about reader response than my own personal relationship with yoga. I worry about repeating sets because I don’t want readers to think I’m in a yoga rut or I just avoid my blog altogether out of guilt over my lack of standard, video-led yoga. I’m not deleting this blog at all, but I wanted to address what I think has been troubling me as I’ve tried to keep up my practice. I do want to start posting again about my sessions, and I want to start regular sessions period, but I don’t know if I’ll have many daily posts. To clarify, I will still aspire to do daily stretches, but my updates may be less frequent. Ideally no fewer than one a week to recap the week’s yoga. This is all sort of in flux though, so I guess you’ll just have to stay tuned to see how it turns out.
Ok guys, here I am, bashfully writing a post a few weeks after my “re-dedication to goals” post. I’m starting to think that my initial goal of writing daily may have been a bit too ambitious. Not because it’s impossible to work out the time, but because it is surprisingly hard to come up with something to say for 365 days straight. My life has fallen into a fairly predictable routine of work, sleep, food, and the internet. I do go out occasionally and watch a movie (Captain America: The Winter Soldier was fantastic – go see it now) or get coffee, but I’m not great at exploring the area. My hopes are that now that Spring has come and the weather’s getting nicer to be around, I’ll get my family to go out with me and see a bit of the town. When I moved I wanted to make sure I really got to know the area, and so far all I’ve really gotten to know is the mall because I work there. It’s a start, but I want more.
I hope that you all are doing alright and having much more success with staying on track than I’ve been. Ideally you’ll get a post tomorrow, but we’ll see how it goes.
Good news everyone, I’m not dead! And neither is my laptop anymore! And neither is my work schedule!
My laptop (christened JARVIS) started doing this really weird thing where the backlit was jolty and darkening until one day it completely went out. I could still see my screen if I strained my eyes but it was extremely difficult and make it effectively useless. While I was trying to get someone to come look at my (thankfully under warranty) laptop, my hours at work skyrocketed.
Now, when I say skyrocketed, keep in mind that for months now my average has been about 16 hours a week. Then I was scheduled for around 18-20 and I’ve also been snagging as many open shifts as possible. This has boosted my hours so that instead of having 3 – 4 days a week off, I have 1. This has been great for my paycheck (though not super great, again, minimum wage in retail and only about 25 hours a week), but not great for my everything else.
I’ve fallen behind in keeping up with my friends’ lives, I’ve stopped doing yoga because my body is so done by the end of the day (especially as it’s getting used to being up and active and standing for more hours) that it’s nearly impossible to work up the oomph to get going, I haven’t done any reading and even my eating and sleeping has gone to the wayside. This is clearly not a healthy way to live and I’m working on changing it, but I try to stay pretty candid about where I’m at in things.
My plan to get back on track is to turn on my HabitRPG that’s been “at the inn” for… well… since the 9th, and try to casually implement little things here and there. If I get five poses in a night, I’m calling it a yoga victory. If I grab something to eat before work and eat a decent-ish meal after work, it’s better than not eating til whatever time I get done for the day. I’m going to try to get back into the routine of doing my blog posts either right after or before I go to work.
It might be tiring to read about my constant do-overs but from what I can tell, all you can do is accept it and try to move on again. I am starting to handle the physical demands of work more, which is good because I’m still shooting for full time employment in some capacity at some place by the end of the year. I just need to get my time management involved as well. I’m also going to try and strive to text or somehow communicate with friends at least once a day or a few times a week. I’ve never wanted to be the kind of person who drops all personal relationships for work, and I’m sure as hell not letting it happen over minimum wage.
I’ve mentioned previously that there were some medical concerns with my mom. It’s been diagnosed as arthritis and we were (finally) able to get her prescriptions filled. I’m so damn grateful for insurance because they came to just about $2 copay which is basically a lifesaver. Unfortunately the pain meds aren’t working for her quite yet, but I’m hoping that’s just because her body is getting used to the pills and will sort out soon.
As I mentioned in my last post, this is going to be a very busy week for me. Because of that, I think tomorrow will be spent half lounging/half preparing. I want to try and figure out and prep meals for the week and make sure I have my clothes washed and laid out and try to keep that up. My room could stand some more cleaning, so I’ll likely be trying to tackle that a bit too.
I will try to make sure I post a little something every day to keep you guys in the loop and to keep up my writing. I hope you’re all also having productive and good days!
Today as I stared at the Swap Shift binder, I was met with a crossroads.
A (very rare) cashiering shift was up for grabs on a day that I didn’t work. The catch? It was on one of the two days I had off this coming week. A part of me hemmed and hawed about whether or not I should take it, whether I needed the day off more than I needed the $30ish I’d earn by working that shift. Then this quote came to mind and I realized I owed it to myself to work for my goals more than having more free time to sit around and not be productive.
To be clear, I don’t think there’s anything wrong about taking lazy days. We all need them to get by and there’s no shame in that.
But I also know that the time comes when you have to ask yourself what you really want, and whether you’re willing to put in the work to get there.
I want financial security. I want more hours. I want to be able to handle my bills without the fear of not having enough to cover it. I want to be able to buy a pair of regular jeans AND work pants, without having to decide (and always opting for work).
So I took that shift, and I’ll keep on taking more of them because my future depends on it and while I am not endangering my health, I’m going to go after that money with every legal opportunity I get.